Cherish My Daughter

So you can watch my second attempt with MG3 here . Things I did differently? 1. Fewer Braids. 2. Cornrowed the base, instead of individual threaded sections. 3. Wound the thread around the base only 2 times. 4. Wound the thread more firmly down the length of the braid. This resulted in a stiffer braid. 5. Left a lot more excess string at the ends, and tucked them away. I'll be back in a couple of weeks to share if any of this helped.

So I ran into some problems taking down MG3's hair....I share it all here --along with some valuable lessons. As bad as it looked, MG3's hair felt so good, I was determined to work harder on my technique to improve this method for her. Time will tell. Stay tuned for round 2!

You can watch how I fumbled my way through this one here .

Our relationship with nappy hair and fuzz can affect everything--even organizing the kids to take a picture in time to send out Christmas cards to our loved ones. I confess, I really struggled this year. There's nothing wrong with wanting everyone to look their best, and a fresh style is beautiful. My problem is I've been swamped with seasonal activity. I've had no time to calmly sit and lovingly do hair. I certainly could have ripped through their strands to get the job done, but it just wasn't worth it to me. I don't believe in suffering to be beautiful. I finally realized the cards would never go out if I waited for the day I could freshen up all the girls' styles--especially when a wash is necessary for them all. One morning I woke up and noticed that my son was wearing red and white. A few minutes later MG3 came down the stairs in a red shirt. Her hair was fuzzy wuzzy to the max, but I knew right then that I needed to seize the moment. I rushed upst...

I've been hunting for a style gentle on MG3's edges. Generally, her edges slide right out of her style and feel brittle. I love this twisted bangs and bun combination. I used Fantasia IC gel to twist and a small amount to smooth her bun. Her bun fuzzes up quickly but it works well with the twists.

Why am I here again? MG3's hair is so soft and full and happy after being loose. I think her hair thrives better unhindered. I'm still not up for styling every day but I've been experimenting with letting her wear a chunky shrunken fro, without all the curl defining products and manipulation. I washed her hair, added leave in conditioner, blotted away the excess water and finger combed it into an afro shape. I took a head band, doubled it around her head and pushed it into place to fashion the puff pictured above. At night I remove the band and let her sleep with her fro loose. In the morning I spritz her hair liberally with plain water and finger comb her sleep matted fro back into the shape I want and use the headband to fashion a new puff. No brushing, no gel and no extra products. When her hair feel dry I will do a conditioner wash and start over. It's been super easy and her hair looks great.

MG3's shrunken and sleep flattened fro! MG3's hair LOVES water! If I wet her hair every single day and seal the moisture with a light oil it feels silky and elastic. MG3's nappy hair LOVES leave in conditioner. When I add leave in conditioner to her damp or wet hair, followed by a holding product like gel, her coils freeze in tiny coffee stirrer size coils. If I listen to her hair, it's telling me, I want to wash and go . Actually, many people will tell you their nappy hair loves water, and feels moist when they wet it often. Wash and go isn't just for nappy girls some folks describe as having "good hair" (I hate that terminology). The truth is we may find that most nappy hair feels good when we wash and go. The struggle may come later. Think tangles, and maintenance. For me, I just don't have the time to follow my daughter into the shower every morning so she can douse her hair, shake, apply product, style and drip while being sure to never to...

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Mocha Girl Three has fuzzy naps. Her hair is silky soft and fine. It stretches long when saturated with water. As it dries, the individual strands clump into curly little coils. If I apply gel to Mocha Girl Three's wet hair, small ringlets and waves are set all over her head. If I allow Mocha Girl Three's hair to dry naturally, applying only a thin layer of shea butter, it frizzes up within several hours no matter how I style it. At one time, I frustrated myself by constantly trying to smooth her hair with a brush. I styled her hair almost daily, but had to stop when I noticed it was breaking excessively. Fuzzy naps can be delicate. I began matching her outfits with caps when we left the house. I did my best to force Mocha Girl Three's hair to adapt to the methods I used with her older sisters, but failed miserably. Her strands are fine, and many of the styles that work well for her sisters, made her hair look sparse . Mocha Girl Three's small braids were thi...

Most of us expect nappy hair to behave like straight hair. We wash our hair like the women in shampoo commercials and marvel when we're left with a mass of tangles. We detangle with small tooth combs, expecting them to slide through without interference. We stretch our nappy hair out, walk into a mist, and huff when it shrinks back up. We purchase one product after another to make it shine, and conclude something's wrong when it doesn't. Our biggest problem is a lack of understanding of what we can expect from nappy hair. Nappy hair is full of tight twists and coils and bends which refract light. As a result, it won't shine in its shrunken state. I saved myself lots of money and frustration when I stopped expecting my daughters' hair to shine like the straight haired models on television. I learned to expect a healthy sheen, and stop assuming my daughters' hair was dry because it wasn't shiny. I learned to test for dryness by rubbing the strands betw...