For some reason I was really worried about Mg3's delivery. Looking back, I'm perplexed as to why her delivery made me so anxious. My support system had improved from what it was like with previous births. We were finally living in our hometown where I could access my relatives AND friends. Perhaps it was because, our lifestyles had changed so much. People were busier and more difficult to access in NYC. People around me always seemed to be running. Their lives stretched them so much. I didn't think they were available, though I never doubted they loved me.
I worried a lot about who would be around to take me to the hospital, and if everything would work out for someone to stay with my 3 older children. If my husband was at work when labor started, I realized that under the best of circumstances it would take him a minimum of ninety minutes to reach me. Everyone worked, so I kept replaying this scenario over and over with everyone I knew. Maybe I could ask a fellow homemaker? What about their kids and routines? Would they get to me in time? For some reason, all of this became a huge deal to my pregnant mind.
I should have exhaled, because God has always shown himself faithful to me. I never know the details in advance, but things work out.
I started having labor contractions at 1AM on a Sunday morning. I stayed in bed for as long as I could. They were easy contractions. Everyone in the house was sleeping peacefully. The pain wasn't bad at all, but around 4 AM, I decided to get in the shower because it was soothing. I had been training myself to relax through an all natural birth and had a midwife waiting for me at the hospital. The shower really relaxed me and sped things up. By 5 AM I was certain I was having strong productive contractions, so I woke my husband up and called the midwife.
She picked something up in my voice in the midst of a contraction because suddenly she shouted, "WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING AT HOME???"
I called my sister who lived in the same development. In fact, I could look at her front door from my living room window. They agreed to come and stay with the sleeping kids while my husband and I rushed to the hospital.
When we arrived I was almost completely dilated. The pain of the contractions didn't challenge me until it was time to push. I thought I'd never make it through, but after several pushes Mg3 was out.
For the first time I realized what a woman's body really feels like after pushing out a baby. Minus the epidural....everything was throbbing. I remember being really puzzled by this and asking the nurse if something was wrong, but she laughed and reminded me that I had just passed a baby through a spot that's not generally so stretched. LOL! I was sooooo happy.
My first impression of Mg3 was awe. She was so alert. She stared at me with eyes that were communicating a message. It scared me a little. This was no senseless blank slate. She looked at me like, "Hi Mom! So this is what you look like."
She seemed to be studying me as intently as I was studying her and I was struck by the reality that I had been given another person to cherish.
Happy Birthday Mg3! You're still the same and I'm so grateful God trusted me with you.