Cherish My Daughter

Y'all know by now that I am the farthest thing from a product junkie. I'm a firm believer that if something is working for you then stick with it. Even if I wanted to spend my time trying new things for entertainment--I'm working with so many nappy heads I'd be broke before long. If I try something new and add it to our rotation of tried and true products--you can be sure that the product really made an impression on me. You've heard me mention my Scalp Stimulator Shampoo Bar by Bobeam Naturals. I love it on my locks but it works just as well for my entire family of loose haired nappies. I contacted Laquita, owner of Bobeam Naturals, to find out if she could recommend any of her other bars for my family. She was happy to send me several bars. I haven't tried them all yet. I wanted to use each bar for at least a month on all of the girls before making a judgement. Since we've all been swimming ALOT and washing our hair multiple times a week--this wa...

What if my four daughter's had locks and I allowed their locks to free form--meaning I allow the locks to form on their own? Even if I chose to cultivate their locks, wouldn't my routine would be much simpler? Imagine only having to maintain one to two inches of new growth every other month by twisting or latching the roots! Imagine NEVER detangling again! I mean, I don't think locks look that great--maybe on some people, but wouldn't it be worth it so I wouldn't have to struggle through these long grooming sessions anymore? It's taking over my life, shouldn't I have the right to choose whether I want to give that much? What about me? OR I feel so blessed to be able to adopt this baby girl from the continent of Africa. I only know how to deal with straight and wavy hair. I love my new daughter so much already, but I'm completely overwhelmed by dealing with her hair. My friends are telling me I don't stand a chance, and that the easiest thing...

I say it all of the time....my kids have the BEST father! Happy Father's Day Mocha Dad!

Many of you have requested a video so I'm doing one, but you should know that I'm NOT giving credit to any particular product for the success I've had with the girls' hair. I think we fall prey so much to false marketing and many of us will buy anything that promises to increase growth or eliminate dryness. I've had a cabinet full of products in the past that did absolutely NOTHING toward fixing the problems I was experiencing with my girls' hair. Their hair remained the same length year after year and was very dry and brittle. I had to change my expectations, my methods and be committed to just letting their hair do what it was designed to do. This can be very hard, especially when many cultures use the straight aesthetic to measure beauty. In my experience, trying to keep vibrant nappy hair smooth and perfectly coifed at all times is a recipe for dryness which often leads to breakage. People who know me in real life can testify that I am at home with A LO...

You asked for it --here it is! Check it out on YouTube .

I doubt I'll blog about these unless you really want me to, but I've been asked to share some of my homemaking tips by some viewers who also know me in real life. I decided to start with a video on freezer cooking because it's made such a tremendous difference in my family life. I certainly didn't invent it and you'll find many books, blogs and articles about it. I'm sharing the way I've tweaked it to make it more manageable for me. I also uploaded a video on meal planning . As always, let me know what you think.

A couple of months after getting married my husband and I were praying about our future children. At first we were just dreaming. We wanted a family but were determined to finish our graduate degrees first. I had just started my masters program and Mocha Dad was nearly finished with his PhD. As we prayed we felt God respond. We imagined we'd have a son with a talent for music. MP started showing a musical interest around the age of 3. While playing with the same musical instruments as other toddlers his age, he would pick out melodies he heard from us and others who sang near him. We noticed and remembered our prayer experience about him early in our marriage. We waited until he was 6 years old to introduce MP to formal lessons. We are blessed to see all that the Lord is doing with him and look forward to where God will lead him to use his gift. These days MP is always composing something original. Here's his performance earlier today, at his 8th grade graduation.

Mg3's hair is so soft! The ends look great! The bundle I created to hold the sidewinder in place held together well and came out easily with my seam ripper. I think it would have been difficult to avoid cutting hair had I tried to use scissors. If you want to try this method (bundling for the ends instead of beads) I highly recommend picking up a seam ripper. I bought mine at Walmart in the crafts/sewing department. I paid less than $3. I'm sure they can also be found in any fabric/craft store where sewing materials are sold. Here's the video ! Check out the BLOOPERS video too! This one was fun to put together.

I've been looking for an alternative to beads and a way to secure the ends of my African Threaded styles so my girls can wear their hair down the way they like. I think the SIDEWINDERS found on hairholders.com may be my solution. Here's what I've done .

I can't believe I did this video, but I really appreciate Hubby's willingness to participate. Is that giggly girl really me and after 17 years? LOL! Here it is!

This is an old one--1997! I was watching it with my daughter the other day and had a completely different reaction from when I watched it as my much younger self when it aired on TV. I remember spending the first twenty minutes of the movie arguing with the multi-racial cast and refusing to accept a world where race is completely ignored. My hair wasn't natural and I didn't even notice the celebration of the diversity of our choice of styles as women of African descent. I was delighted to discover this movie all over again. There are some things I would change about the movie, but I think if a mother is determined to share the Cinderella story with her daughter, this is a unique one to offer. All my girls especially enjoyed the music. Check out my video review for more detail on my thoughts and concerns.

We spend so much time trying to pull negative things out of our kids, but how much time do we really spend purposefully offering them a desirable alternative. When it comes to promoting a healthy self image in our daughters (and sons), I'm learning that I really need to be proactive. I need to present to my children the norm I want them to have. If you're reading this blog, I'm probably preaching to the choir --clearly YOU read-- but we really need to be reading to our kids. Some of us are juggling so much and I know it can be hard even to find a moment to breathe, but we must read to our children. I believe it is a highly effective tool to foster rich discussion about a plethora of issues. I always marvel at how much my kids are drawn to images. Are you sick of listening to them watch their favorite video over and over yet? If we give them the opportunity, kids will do the same with books they love. I often find mine staring and thinking. What if the image they are...