Friday, July 13, 2012
I've been prepping myself for the possibility of one of my girls coming to me with this request for a long time. I thought I'd consider their motive from every angle. I thought I'd be ready.
I was wrong.
I've recently been in conversation with HmG about this very issue. You've watched her hair grow and flourish and flourish. She has ALOT of hair. I think it intimidates her. Sometimes it intimidates me!!!
She says she believes natural hair is beautiful.
She says she likes the look of natural hair more than the look of relaxed hair.
She asks me anyway, "Can I relax my hair?"
I shout WHY?
She says, "Because I just can't see myself spending all that time doing my hair!!! It's not worth it to me. I just think a relaxer will be easier." She finished by saying that the risk of damage to her hair is a risk she's willing to take.
I was floored. I JUST wasn't expecting that to be the reason.
I've spent several weeks reflecting on how HmG is feeling. It has been a lot of work for me managing 5 natural heads of hair but at the end of the day, there are many aspects of grooming I genuinely enjoy. It never occurred to me that a daughter of mine could possibly have no interest in working with hair.
I was disappointed. I'm being honest. I was also honest with HmG and she had no trouble directing me back to my own videos and my own words about letting her spread her wings with my full support.
I've given her my answer.
When HmG is financially able to afford the maintenance of a relaxer, and can take herself to her appointments, I won't stop her.
It's HER journey.
I've given her the best of what I know and must have faith that her journey will be just as meaningful as mine. My resolve has come from the mistakes I've made, I'm realizing my daughters may not choose to learn from my mistakes. They may need proof for themselves.
In the end, I believe HmG will exceed my expectations, no matter what.
Train children in the way they should go; when they grow old, they won’t depart from it.